Feelings of Peace

 

I have probably sounded pretty ungrateful lately. As excited as I am to be having another baby I have been letting the stress of life make me very anxious about his or her arrival. With the troubles we had getting or staying pregnant you would imagine that I wouldn’t even think about complaining. But as the time draws near I have been struggling with understanding why we had to wait until what is turning out to be one of the most stressful times of this year for us.

I finally asked Clark to give me a blessing to be able to calm down and to have the strength to handle dealing with a newborn and toddler along with everything else we’ll have to do very soon after the arrival of the little one. That definitely helped but I was also determined to get out to the temple one last time before baby. I was thrilled that our ward temple night happened to be one week before my due date and we made the trek out there with some friends. Unfortunately I didn’t pay much attention and was informed that my recommend had expired last month. I was understandably upset and wondered why I hadn’t thought to check that or why my good intentions were not working out. In any case I felt that Clark didn’t need to wait outside with me and waste an opportunity to serve so I sat out on the beautiful grounds by myself and took the opportunity to pour out my soul to my Heavenly Father.

At one point I stopped to pay attention to the hymns that were playing on the speakers and one song struck me in particular. All I could remember from the song was one phrase so I pulled out my phone and looked it up to see what the rest of the lyrics were. It just so happened to be “How Gentle God’s Commands” and as I looked at the words I was overcome with peace and knew that hearing this song was an answer to my prayer.

How gentle God’s commands,
How kind His precepts are!
Come, cast your burdens on the Lord,
And trust His constant care.

Beneath His watchful eye
His saints securely dwell;
That hand which bears all nature up
Shall guide His children well.

Why should this anxious load
Press down your weary mind?
Haste to your heav’nly Father’s throne,
And sweet refreshment find.

His goodness stands approved,
Unchanged from day to day;
I’ll drop my burden at His feet,
And bear a song away.

 

Even though I wasn’t able to go into the temple I received the peace I had hoped for by going to the temple that night. Luckily I was able to renew my recommend this past weekend and some friends went with me on a Tuesday afternoon so I could squeeze in one last session before the baby comes.

I am grateful for answers to prayer. I am grateful that my husband is a worthy priesthood holder who can bless our family when ever we need him to. I am grateful that I am never alone and that I can turn to my Savior and my Heavenly Father whenever I need comfort or a little (or a lot of) extra strength to get through hard things I may face.